Southwold – conquered!

We made it to Southwold on our bicycle jaunt. Not as quickly as hoped for, due to multiple bike-related delays, but we made it. There were disintegrating bicycle pumps, punctures, chains coming off, setting off issues, steering issues and then general “we’ve cycled 40 miles and it hurts” issues. Unfortunately my photojournalism skills are atrocious, most of the more interesting moments were spent with me covered in oil and swearing rather than taking pictures of said activity, and so you’ve missed out 🙁

I do have a couple of pictures, including proof that we made it there:

The only problem with our arrival was that it was 10 minutes after the town shut up shop for the afternoon, so we missed out on our fish and chips. This was after cycling past five open shops already that day. We were further tortured by having to zoom past a further five on the way home, when all we could do was stop for a quick drink of water.

Fish and Chip desparation

If there’s one complaint I must raise about Cambridge, it’s the dearth of fish and chip shops anywhere near the town centre. This is a problem we’ve had to deal with since the first year, and wasn’t even alleviated when we lived out for a year in the north of the city – the nearest shop there was of dubious quality at best. Well, good news! As I walked down the the train station to come home for Easter, what should I spot but a shiny new shopfront on Regent Street, looking incredibly like a chippy. It’s still being renovated, far too soon for Google Street View to catch up, but there is hope at least.

However, the promise of some possibly decent chips in a few months isn’t quite good enough, and so I’ve decided to take things into my own hands. This friday, Mark and I will be cycling by tandem to Southwold for some fish, chips, and possibly a beer. Mark’s going to be the powerhouse, but due to extenuating circumstances we’ll let him off the steering (most of the time at least). Mark is blind, but sometimes you’d be hard-pressed to realise. He is currently studying for an MSci at Hatfield College, Durham, rows in the college First VIII, is a member of the MCR committee and lived out in a house with friends for a year, looking after himself. When you see both the range of activities that could have been problematic for him, and the number of techniques he has developed to get around them, it’s inspirational.

I’ve planned a route on the GPS, about 48 miles all told wihich should be nicely manageable with the two of us. Mapping services for GPS devices generally consist of you buying a £150 handheld gizmo, then £100+ for each country’s roads. This is somewhat expensive, so I’ve been involved with the OpenStreetMap project, which is an attempt to make a copyright-free map of the UK. The method is is quite cunning. Tracing maps from other sources is legally dubious, so what happens instead is that people track themselves as they walk/run/cycle/drive around their local roads, and then upload these GPS tracks to a central server. They, or someone else, can then trace over the route they took and draw in the roads. Thus the location of the roads in the new map isn’t dependent on any other datasource. Whilst this generates a map which is at times is at least as good as Google Maps and can be edited instantly when things change, in places where people haven’t done the groundwork the coverage is poor. Thus out in the sticks here there was a whole one road going through Loddon, I’ve been busily cycling around fixing that. The bonus of free data is that you can transfer it, in my case downloading a version formatted for my Garmin GPS. The whole world is available, in varying states of completeness, the only price is a little tinkering time copying them to the GPS unit.

Left 4 Dead 2 (After Extra Time)

I got L4D2 for Christmas, but a well-timed sale this week meant that we got over the four-person requirement and turned it into a good sociable game. Now my need to lock myself in a darkened room and swear loudly at people across the internet has been sated 😀

It’s much, much harder than the original, though the introduction of swords/cricket bats/crowbars has maybe something to do with it. I get to kill hundreds of zombies but running suicidally into the horde isn’t great for staying alive in the long-run.

One campaign down, if only they hadn’t left me behind to die 🙁

It’s a straight line, dammit!

A few months ago, we switched to British Gas’s EnergySmart programme, as it would supposedly save some money and it came with a smart electricity monitor. There’s been talk of “Smart Meters” in the media, they will report your electricity and gas usage directly, saving everyone a load of hassle. Unfortunately, this is not what a smart electricity monitor is, all they do is sit in your house and display how much electricity you’re using at the time. No reporting at all in fact. It turns out, each month we are supposed to go into the dark cupboard full of meters and read our usage ourselves, then report back to British Gas manually. If we don’t do this, they will estimate how much to charge us.

Now in the past, we were on a fixed monthly payment which was checked periodically by a meter-reading man. That seemed to be going well, our usage was pretty similar to the monthly consumption that they would expect for a flat of this size and it was all fine and dandy. In fact, going back through the records our electricity use has been a dead-straight line for the last 12 months, with an R-squared value of 0.999 (the closer to 1, the nearer the points are to a perfectly straight line). So if they had to make an estimated reading now, you might expect that they would use the figures from before to decide how much to charge us. Oh no no no.

Their estimated meter reading for December was exactly the same as the number we had provided in November. January? Same as November. February? You can guess. So having just gone and checked my accounts, it turns out that we haven’t been billed for any electricity use since the autumn and there’s a monster bill on the way soon. Fun times.

The 3D Tax

We went to see Alice in Wonderland last night, which isn’t bad. Apart from one thing.

The only option available to us was the ‘3D’ version, even at the Arts Picturehouse who perhaps should have known better. However, this isn’t really a 3D film – it was shot in 2D and then molested. Although its not immediately obvious exactly what is up, you soon realise that the 3D effects aren’t as pervasive as they were in Avatar or Up, in fact the whole thing looks a lot more like a pop-up book. In the sections with real actors (as opposed to the CGI parts which have been done properly) each person has been ‘cut out’ of the 2D picture that they were originally filmed in and moved forwards or backward in 3D space as required. While this means that people in the background do look farther away, their features are flat like a cardboard cut-out, someone’s nose is no farther forward than their ears. What you see as a viewer is a series of flat people floating about in space, which is disconcerting and in my opinion detracts from an otherwise pretty film. In fact, as they had to cut the people out afterwards, you also see bits of the background floating around too, for example when cutting around the details of someone’s beard was too complicated then a vaguely circular piece has been selected as the “head” and it all gets moved forwards.

The most annoying thing about all this, is that Real3D, the people behind the technology which has sprung up everywhere charge a £1.50 tax on every ticket going into a 3D film, even if that ticket is a one of the free Orange Wednesdays ones. The cheek!

In conlcusion, if you have a choice avoid the 3D at all costs – the effects in the CGI parts don’t make up for the dodgy live-action bits.

Cross-country

Snow. Again.

Great.

It’s not even real snow, just this slushy, sticky rubbish that makes you cold and wet with none of the prettiness. On my way in to work this morning I was forced to partake in some bicycle-biathlon, which is much like the Winter Olympics version but with a road bike. That is, you slither around on some rutted slushy snow, try not to end up in the Cam, and then shoot someone. Haven’t decided who yet, possibly a climate skeptic.

He is Born

Following on from the excellent example in Rock Paper Shotgun, Priyan, Adam, Sam, Tom and I have started a game of Solium Infernum. This is a turn-based, play-by-email game from an independent developer, and is more of an electronic boardgame than anything else really, with the advantage that being unable to see what everyone else is scheming means that you’re in for some big surprises a lot of the time.

The premise is as follows: old Lucifer has gone AWOL, leaving behind a collection of angry, power-hungry, despotic, back-stabbing, cloth-eared, swivel-eyed, fornicating little gits to scrap over the spoils. However, Hell turns out to be a somewhat more structured place than the land up above, in that you can’t just go invading someone’s country without a good reason – you must earn the permission from the Infernal Conclave to follow up a diplomatic snub or insult. At this point you’ve entered into a Vendetta and pretty much anything goes.

Now at the moment the game is still ongoing, and I can’t go into much detail about anything because I’m sure that anything I say will be taken down and used against me (coughknickerscough), but I can introduce you to my character, Dr Monoculus.

Name: Dr Desmond Olivier Octavius Monoculus
Job Title: Duke of Hell (soon to be upgraded to Ruler, of course)

Likes: Snappy clothes, pulling the legs off spiders, arranging the skulls of his vanquished foes in alphabetical order.
Dislikes: Mess, short people, rain (so he’s in a bad mood at the moment)

Now, unfortunately, I have to remain silent until things finish, but in the mean time I’ll be preparing a series of battle reports to release once it’s all over…